{"id":5674,"date":"2022-02-01T03:00:55","date_gmt":"2022-02-01T03:00:55","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/learn.elca.org\/jle\/?p=5674"},"modified":"2022-02-01T23:31:45","modified_gmt":"2022-02-01T23:31:45","slug":"agapic-love-social-media-and-clergy-ethics","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/learn.elca.org\/jle\/agapic-love-social-media-and-clergy-ethics\/","title":{"rendered":"Agapic Love, Social Media, and Clergy Ethics"},"content":{"rendered":"

[1] Social media platforms have fast become essential, embedded institutions. By the term “social media” I’m referring to web-based platforms that host individuals and communities, these include Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, TikTok, YouTube, WeChat, WhatsApp, MeWe, Tumblr, Reddit, LinkedIn, Snapchat, Pinterest, Meetup, Medium, Quora, and Twitch. According to the Pew Research Center, in 2005, 5% of American adults used at least one social media platform.\u00a0 By 2011 that share had risen to half of all Americans, and today 72% of the American public uses some type of social media.[1]<\/a>\u00a0 Social network platforms have almost quintupled their total user base in the last decade, from 970 million in 2010 to more than 4.48 billion users in July 2021.[2]<\/a>\u00a0\u00a0 As of September, 2021, Facebook alone reported over 2.91 billion monthly active users (MAU’s) worldwide.[3]<\/a>\u00a0 The reality is that social media is advancing so fast that it is challenging the ability of people everywhere to keep up with it.<\/p>\n

[2] Those vocationally committed to spiritual life and health urgently need to focus attention upon the expanding phenomenon of social networking. As Shannon Vallor points out in her essay in the Stanford Encyclopedia of Philosophy, social media “has profoundly reshaped how many human beings initiate and\/or maintain virtually every type of ethically significant social bond or role: friend-to-friend, parent-to-child, co-worker-to-co-worker, employer-to-employee, teacher-to-student, neighbor-to-neighbor, seller-to-buyer, doctor-to-patient, and voter-to-voter, to offer just a partial list.”[4]<\/a> Lutheran clergy, scholars, and church leaders have little choice but to engage and evolve with social media and smart phone apps because people in our congregations, our students, and just about everybody else are on these platforms.<\/p>\n

[3] In past eras, pastoral relationships and Christian mission were limited to the physical place where clergy live and work, integrated into neighborhoods and communities where they had been planted.\u00a0 The advent and explosion of social media has changed this profoundly.\u00a0 These days, a pastor or church leader can do ministry virtually anywhere, including in a neighboring town, in a forum being led half way around the world, or even in a wholly virtual space in which colleagues collaborate. This shift in limits changes the shape and texture of ministry, and, thus, requires ethical consideration.<\/p>\n

[4] More recently, the Covid-19 pandemic has forced most of us to utilize social media for providing worship services, Bible Studies, and pastoral care online for almost two years.\u00a0 The user data suggests that social media in one form or another is likely to become permanent. For better or worse, social media is bound to become an expanding part of doing ministry work in our congregations and our communities going forward.<\/p>\n

[5] As a parish pastor, I have grown more intrigued by the rise of social media and the potential (and danger) of social media for Christian ministry.\u00a0 Volunteer work as a moderator on the \u201cELCA Clergy\u201d Facebook page[5]<\/a> has led me to consider how Christian ethics is best practiced on social media — and especially how Christian love (\u1f00\u03b3\u03b1\u03c0\u03ae) may be conveyed and applied in a Christian community built on a social media platform.<\/p>\n

[6] The purpose of this essay is to offer some insights with regard to social media and Christian ministry for Lutheran pastors who use social media platforms every day for work, play, and service.\u00a0 I especially want to make the point that faith in God and agapic love in service to others guides the most ethical and helpful means to minister to people on social media — whether this ministry is to clergy, people associated with our congregations, or with perfect strangers. I’ve learned that the key to starting and developing open and meaningful relationships online is to practice agapic love in the virtual realm just as one is called to do IRL ( in \u201creal life\u201d).<\/p>\n

The Centrality of Agape<\/em> To Ethical Relationships Online<\/strong><\/p>\n

[7] Christian ethics among fellow Christians begins and ends with Jesus’ command to love and serve one another as the Lord loves and serves us.\u00a0 We find this foundation for ethics in the Gospel of John where Jesus commands his disciples to love (\u1f00\u03b3\u03b1\u03c0\u1fb6\u03c4\u03b5) one another. (John 13:34)\u00a0 We find it in the Gospel of Mark when a scribe asks Jesus, \u201cWhich commandment is the first of all?\u201d and Jesus answers, \u201cThe first is, \u2018Hear, O Israel: the Lord our God, the Lord is one; you shall love (\u1f00\u03b3\u03b1\u03c0\u03ae\u03c3\u03b5\u03b9\u03c2)the Lord your God with all your heart, and with all your soul, and with all your mind, and with all your strength.\u2019\u00a0 The second is this, \u2018You shall love (\u1f00\u03b3\u03b1\u03c0\u03ae\u03c3\u03b5\u03b9\u03c2) your neighbor as yourself.\u2019\u201d (Mark 12:29-31)\u00a0 And we find it in Paul\u2019s iconic hymn in 1st<\/sup> Corinthians 13,\u00a0 \u201cLove (\u1f00\u03b3\u03b1\u03c0\u03ae) is patient; love is kind; love is not envious or boastful or arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; it does not rejoice in wrongdoing, but rejoices in the truth.\u00a0 It bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. Love never ends.\u201d The Lutheran tradition teaches that, while our loving actions toward others do not save us, we love because God loves.\u00a0 We love others agapically and treat others in kind, empathetic, and compassionate ways out of gratitude and thanksgiving for what the Lord has done for us.<\/p>\n

[8] The accent of agape<\/em> is on humility and self-giving.\u00a0 It serves the unique needs of the “neighbor.”\u00a0 Martin Luther King Jr. argued that agape<\/em> is the form of love that values each person regardless of their individual characteristics or behavior.[6]<\/a>\u00a0 In my view, the command to love applies to those we meet by happenstance on social media just as much as it does to our family, friends and church community members in person. We need to take seriously those we cannot see on the other side of our keyboards and iPhone screens.<\/p>\n

[9] For Martin Luther, ethics for Christians are not so much about timeless truths or rigid rules or binding programs. They are survival ethics in dangerous times. Vital, down-to-earth, and practical, yes, but not legalistic.\u00a0 For Luther, ethics are to be adaptable to the changing predicaments of humankind.[7]<\/a> Agapic love has some give to it.<\/p>\n

[10] Clergy and laity alike do well to be mindful that meeting the ethical challenges of a virtual mission field is going to take flexibility and creativity in a space inhabited by literally billions of virtual members of the body of Christ who are nevertheless somewhere still embodied human beings exhibiting all of their creaturely thoughts and agendas. Trading posts on a thread on Facebook is just as much a spiritual exercise as chatting with members in the narthex after worship or expressing empathy and compassion for a church member facing serious surgery in the hospital.\u00a0 We ought not to take these interactions lightly.\u00a0 Indeed, because the virtual world is still new territory for us, we need to take extra care as we participate in it.\u00a0 The virtual world is still strange and new for many of us. We have not yet built the habits to make our loving interactions easy or automatic.<\/p>\n

Our Secular Age<\/strong><\/p>\n

[11] I recently took an online course called “Religion & the Spiritual Crisis: Ministry In A Secular Age” led by Tripp Fuller and Andrew Root.\u00a0 As a part of the course, I read “A Secular Age”[8]<\/a> by Charles Taylor and “How (Not) To Be Secular: Reading Charles Taylor” by Jamie Smith.[9]<\/a> I was intrigued by the general description Taylor uses to describe Western society and culture today. These books are impossible to unpack adequately in this short essay, but the picture Taylor paints of contemporary Western thought and culture fits my own experience with social media online.<\/p>\n

[12] The main observation Taylor makes is that Western culture and thought has transformed from a “sacred\/profane” frame of reference that dominated Europe 500 years ago to a thoroughly secular frame.\u00a0 It happened in historical steps.[10]<\/a> The medieval frame was one of enchantment that incorporated the divine in every aspect of life.\u00a0 Then the frame of reference began to give way to waves of disenchantment.\u00a0 With the dawning of the Renaissance and the Scientific Revolution, public knowledge and objective truth were separated from private perceptions of individuals. And Christianity began to be experienced as something private, something apart from public life.\u00a0 The Age of Enlightenment in the 18th century produced thinkers in Europe that began to argue that there was no need for God at all.\u00a0 By the turn of the 19th Century, it was not uncommon for people to claim that they had a choice to reject Christianity and religion in general.\u00a0 By the 1950’s and 60’s, individual authenticity and subjectivity became popular as a way to view and organize one’s life.[11]<\/a><\/p>\n

[13] Taylor suggests that this has left a society that frames a thoroughly humanistic world in terms of \u201ctakes and spins.\u201d\u00a0 My \u201ctake\u201d is mine, an individual subjective opinion. \u00a0Religious views are considered to fit here. \u00a0Of course, there are also “spins” which are meant to convince individuals to join groups that advertise that there is not just a variety of \u201ctakes\u201d but actually a \u201csingle way,\u201d a “right way” to view life and the world. Ironically, fundamentalism and atheism share “spin” as the means to convince others to dwell in their singular truth.\u00a0 Yet, even these calls to believe in an absolute truth are seen as merely different \u201ctakes\u201d on life by the majority of people. Individuals may align themselves with these groups when they deem them to fit their unique “take” on life, society, and this world.[12]<\/a>\u00a0 But, they are not particularly loyal.<\/p>\n

[14] Taylor argues that most people do not join along with those who spin rational or irrational theories to promote rigid truths.[13]<\/a>\u00a0 Instead the vast majority in the West live with the cross pressures between these rigid poles as they embrace all of the comforts and advantages offered by thoroughly secular and humanistic thought and culture.\u00a0 Taylor calls this an “immanent frame” of reference. An “immanent frame” has to do with a confidence in instrumental reason and the assumption that the world in which we live is material\/physical and not spiritual.<\/p>\n

[15] What is lost, says Taylor, is the experience of the transcendent \u2013 the sacred \u2013 that was integrated into life 500 years ago in the common conception of the divine.[14]<\/a> Taylor describes “cross pressures” by asserting that all (or at least most) contemporary people live at least partly within the assumptions of this immanent frame, but also feel a call toward a search for meaning that can be found within the transcendent–which is not recognized by the dominant world view. Few of us wish to trade all of the advantages and convenience and medical advancements that go along with contemporary science and technology (including social media apps).\u00a0 Still, there is a sense that despite this progress, something is missing.\u00a0 Something important.<\/p>\n

[16] I suspect that this “something” we miss is a greater sense of spirituality, mystery, and emotional connectedness.\u00a0 Modern people marvel over the amazing communication technologies we have at our disposal and the opportunity to make new friends and instantly communicate with old friends wherever they may be.\u00a0 But social media does not necessarily make individuals closer or more intimate.\u00a0 Most of the time when I engage someone new, I find them to be understandably cautious and cynical about \u201cbeing spun\u201d.<\/p>\n

[17] The \u201ccross-pressures\u201d that Taylor describes are evident on social media.[15]<\/sup><\/a> \u00a0For example, some on social media platforms come to embrace misinformation conspiracy stories as a way to be \u201calone together\u201d. The quasi-religious movement known as \u201cQAnon\u201d is fueled by spin on social media platforms. An American Enterprise Institute survey found that 27% of white evangelical Protestants believe a QAnon conspiracy theory that purports that the former US President is secretly battling a cabal of pedophile political opponents. \u00a0There is no empirical evidence of this, but a large number of users believe the spin. \u00a0Unfortunately, a consequence of the QAnon movement is the unnecessary breakup of many families and friendships —\u00a0 something well documented on web blogs such as Reddit\u2019s QAnonCasualties.[16]<\/sup><\/a> People often don\u2019t know whom or what to trust online \u2013 and can be misled to place their energy and trust in movements that are all too secular and humanistic, and offer little in the way of authentic transcendent love which the Bible says, \u201crejoices in the truth.[17]<\/a><\/p>\n

Wise As Serpents And Gentle As Doves<\/strong><\/p>\n

[18] The problem for clergy and church leaders is that we somehow have to find a way to do ministry in this fluid environment without creating even more division, mistrust and unhealthy bias.\u00a0 Cultivating agape<\/em> can bring some stability and relief to a cross-pressured, chaotic milieu, if we have the time, inclination, and energy to do it.<\/p>\n

[19] Social media is the new spiritual wilderness. It is new territory, for sure, but going into the wilderness, is a well-known journey. \u201cSee, I am sending you out like sheep into the midst of wolves.\u201d Jesus gave his disciples this advice for the work at hand, \u201cBe wise as serpents and gentle as doves.\u201d (Matthew 10:16) Acting in agapic love includes both discernment and kindness. The following are my \u201ctakes\u201d for creating habits of wisdom and gentleness while navigating the wilds of social media.<\/p>\n

[20] Be open<\/strong>. Be willing to learn. Practice humility. Think before reacting. Ask, \u201cIs this response genuinely in line with God\u2019s will to apply agape<\/em> in this relationship?\u201d before pushing the enter key. Seek resonance. Receive challenge. All of us live in a thoroughly secular and humanistic context. All of us embrace and object to portions of it. People from every cultural context, religious tradition (or not), political alignment, and schools of thought are found inhabiting social media. And yet, we are all dealing with the accelerating pace of technological and cultural change (and life in general). There will be people who comfortably live and move in the moment on social media. Some will be left far behind. Others will be caught in-between. One of the greatest challenges people face in contemporary Western society is to develop healthy ways to cope with the rapid pace of change, and avalanche of information available to us with a few finger strokes.<\/p>\n

[21] Practice patience.<\/strong> One serious drawback to communicating on platforms like Facebook and other social media apps is their inherent clunkiness. Most people communicate on Facebook by exchanging a few sentences. It is difficult to chat meaningfully about complex subjects or issues within such limits when we try. It is helpful if clergy and church leaders are mindful that it is easy to misinterpret what others say. It is possible to make typos that skew what we want to convey. \u00a0Most of us are guilty of making absent-minded posts from time to time, and sometimes other users take them out of context.\u00a0 At times we say things impulsively.\u00a0 When we make mistakes, it is embarrassing to admit them. When others make mistakes, we are not always inclined to forgive them.\u00a0 Stopping to think and evaluate the situation from the framework of love can help us build better habits ourselves and be more forgiving of those who do not yet have these habits.<\/p>\n

[22] Know when to turn off the virtual world<\/strong>. Participating on social media places people in a situation Sherry Turkle of MIT describes as of being \u201calone together.\u201d The cyber space that people inhabit makes them three promises: \u201cthat we can always be heard, that we can be whatever we want to be, and we never have to be alone.\u201d [18]<\/a><\/sup>\u00a0 Ironically, in the Social Media Age, families go out to dinner and never say a word to one another as they scroll through Facebook posts and Instagram messages.\u00a0 As social media use increases, \u201creal life\u201d emotional and intimate lives decrease. Turkle warns that as our emotional lives ramp down, so does our capacity for empathy.\u00a0 We may find ourselves sending messages to someone a few feet away.\u00a0 As a result, social media users are becoming more and more emotionally isolated.\u00a0 Turkle\u2019s solution is to \u201ccarve out \u2018sacred spaces\u2019 for conversation in day-to-day life\u2014no devices at the dinner table, [and] study and lounge spaces that are wi-fi free.\u201d [19]<\/a><\/sup><\/p>\n

[23] Recognize signs of technology addiction<\/strong>. Setting aside social media for many is like fighting an addiction. Their identity is defined mainly online. Those committed to agape <\/em>need to connect with people with social media dependencies where they are found. I have discovered that meeting people online can lead to person-to-person counseling in the future (and not necessarily with me).\u00a0 \u201cInternet and Technology Addicts Anonymous\u201d[20]<\/a> may one day become a staple offering at our physical churches. Ironically, meetings today can be found on social media platforms \u2013 and maybe that\u2019s a good thing, at least to start..<\/p>\n

[24] Treat those with whom you interact as persons made in the image of God.<\/strong>\u00a0 Have you ever felt that someone on the other side of your screen was assuming you were less than human?\u00a0 Or that your opinions reflected everything they thought was evil–or at least wrong?\u00a0 All human beings, including both you and the person you’re engaging with online, are complex and at least sometimes irrational to some degree. It is truly tempting to assume that those on the other side of our keyboards are less than people and that their opinions reflect all the negative qualities we ascribe to statements they make that upset us.\u00a0 Human beings are complex creatures and behave irrationally to one degree or another.\u00a0 \u00a0It may make us feel good to publicly condemn them, but that kind of behavior is unlikely to bring about change in the individual. Evidence shows that crowd shaming often makes a person more entrenched.[21]<\/a> And it can be cruel.\u00a0 Lutherans claim that Christ\u2019s death releases the faithful from shame. Thus, posts and threads that have no redemptive purpose are contrary to service in agape <\/em>love. Gentle clergy engage individual persons online in Christ-centered ways that are genuine to the spirit of agape. <\/em><\/p>\n

[25] Use the spiritual gifts you have been given online.<\/strong> Encourage others to use the gifts they have. Paul writes: \u201cThere are different kinds of gifts, but the same Spirit distributes them. There are different kinds of service, but the same Lord. There are different kinds of working, but in all of them and in everyone it is the same God at work.\u201d (1 Corinthians 12:4-6). Celebrate them all. I do the same with the secular people I meet. Christians are not the only kinds of people willing to share agape<\/em> with other people.<\/p>\n

[26] Avoid deliberately causing disruption among Christian users on social media unless you are convinced that you are specially called to the prophetic tradition<\/strong>. Then, when you do so, do it in the spirit of agape <\/em>which is in the service of justice. Basic moral issues surrounding wealth equity, racism, feminism, sexuality, ecology, crime and self-protection, individual freedom, and social responsibility are complex and bound to create controversy. Prophetic voices on social media are often perceived as \u201cclosed\u201d by those who do not know who owns them, consider their comments to be \u201cspin\u201d, and can be perceived by users to be abusive and perhaps draw abuse in response. Or these voices are simply blocked and ignored. \u00a0Biblical prophets were related to the communities and individuals to whom they prophesy. Social media tempts us to believe that everyone should \u201cjust listen\u201d to what we have to say because we are righteous, but relationships need to be established before those who could use to hear prophetic words are willing to listen. Agape<\/em> calls us to point out injustice, respond with measured takes, and also demonstrate justice with our approach, our words, and our deeds.<\/p>\n

[27] Avoid personal judgements and blanket labeling.<\/strong> Ask for clarification when confronting alarming comments. Accept people where they are. Use honest takes. Name calling and cyber harassment are abusive and associated with spin. Punishing people online is a sure way to add to the world’s bitterness and meanness. It may intimidate, but it is not going to change minds. There is enough of that going on.\u00a0 Pastors and church leaders are called to bring objective love to the world without creating more division and ill will if at all possible.\u00a0 When there is a need to oppose immoral or hurtful behavior, confront the offending user in love. Among Christians, follow Matthew 18:15-17.<\/p>\n

[28] Choose your battles.<\/strong>\u00a0 If attempts to bridge differences go nowhere, and the person(s) we are engaging refuse to listen or acknowledge our humanity, take Jesus\u2019 advice: \u201cIf anyone will not welcome you or listen to your words, shake off the dust from your feet as you leave that house or town.\u201d (Matthew 10:14). \u00a0It\u2019s OK to block them.\u00a0 Don\u2019t lose your mental health in an attempt to save someone online.\u00a0 Salvation is God\u2019s job.<\/p>\n

[29] Keep using social media. Our world needs a sense of greater spirituality, ethical relationships, justice, stability, empathy, and compassion.\u00a0 It really is up to people committed to the Lord\u2019s will and the Lord\u2019s ways to apply agape <\/em>wherever people are found. In this secular and technological age, they are found on social media platforms.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

[1]<\/a> Pew Research Center. \u201cSocial Media Fact Sheet\u201d.\u00a0 https:\/\/www.pewresearch.org\/internet\/fact-sheet\/social-media\/<\/p>\n

[2]<\/a> Brian Dean. Backlinko. \u201cSocial Network Usage & Growth Statistics: How Many People Use Social Media in 2021?\u201d Updated Oct. 10, 2021.\u00a0 https:\/\/backlinko.com\/social-media-users<\/p>\n

[3]<\/a> Statista. “Number of monthly active Facebook users worldwide as of 3rd quarter 2021.”\u00a0 \u00a0https:\/\/www.statista.com\/statistics\/264810\/number-of-monthly-active-facebook-users-worldwide\/<\/p>\n

[4]<\/a> Shannon Vallor. \u00a0“Social Networking and Ethics”, The Stanford Encyclopedia of Philosophy (Fall 2021 Edition), Edward N. Zalta (ed.), https:\/\/plato.stanford.edu\/archives\/fall2021\/entries\/ethics-social-networking\/<\/p>\n

[5]<\/a> ELCA Clergy is a private Facebook group platform established by Rev. Clint Schnekloth in 2011 serving the interactive needs of around 7000 ELCA pastors, deacons, church leaders, seminarians and clergy from partner denominations involved in practical ministry.\u00a0 The group is not officially associated with the ELCA denomination, but bears its name as an extension of Rev. Schnekloth’s doctoral work that concluded with the publication of “Mediating Faith: Faith Formation in a Trans-media Era” in 2014.\u00a0 I volunteered to help moderate ELCA Clergy in 2016.<\/p>\n

[6]<\/a> See King, Martin Luther, \u201cNonviolence and Racial Justice\u201d <\/em>\u00a0in Christian Century, February 1957.<\/p>\n

[7]<\/a> Heiko A. Oberman, Luther: Man Between God and the Devil<\/em>. London: Yale University Press, 1989, p. 79.<\/p>\n

[8]<\/a> Charles Taylor. A Secular Age<\/em>.<\/em> Cambridge and London Belknap Press, 2007.<\/p>\n

[9]<\/a> James K A Smith, How (Not) to Be Secular: Reading Charles Taylor<\/em>. Grand Rapids, Michigan and Cambridge, U.K.: William B. Eerdmans Publishing Company, 2014.<\/p>\n

[10]<\/a> Andrew Root & Tripp Fuller. \u201cSession 2: Religion and the Spiritual Crisis\u201d, YouTube, June 22, 2021. https:\/\/www.youtube.com\/watch?v=ex6ElvhMvws&t=2583s&ab_channel=TrippFuller<\/p>\n

[11]<\/a> See Taylor, Chapter 14.<\/p>\n

[12]<\/a> See Taylor, Chapter 15.<\/p>\n

[13]<\/a> See Taylor, Chapter 15.<\/p>\n

[14]<\/a> See Taylor, Chapter 15 & 16.<\/p>\n

[15]<\/a> See Taylor, Chapter 16.<\/p>\n

[16]<\/a> Reddit. QAnonCasualties.\u00a0 https:\/\/www.reddit.com\/r\/QAnonCasualties\/<\/p>\n

[17]<\/a> 1st Corinthians 13:6<\/p>\n

[18]<\/a> Lauren Cassani Davis. \u201cThe Flight From Conversation\u201d. The Atlantic. October 7, 2015. https:\/\/www.theatlantic.com\/technology\/archive\/2015\/10\/reclaiming-conversation-sherry-turkle\/409273\/<\/p>\n

[19]<\/a> Lauren Cassani Davis. \u201cThe Flight From Conversation\u201d. The Atlantic. October 7, 2015. https:\/\/www.theatlantic.com\/technology\/archive\/2015\/10\/reclaiming-conversation-sherry-turkle\/409273\/<\/p>\n

[20]<\/a> Internet and Technology Addicts Anonymous.\u00a0 https:\/\/internetaddictsanonymous.org\/<\/p>\n

[21]<\/a> See Brehm, J.W. A Theory of Psychological Reactance.<\/em> New York: Academic Press, 1966.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

[1] Social media platforms have fast become essential, embedded institutions. By the term “social media” I’m referring to web-based platforms that host individuals and communities, these include Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, TikTok, YouTube, WeChat, WhatsApp, MeWe, Tumblr, Reddit, LinkedIn, Snapchat, Pinterest, Meetup, Medium, Quora, and Twitch. 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